Horror Movie Porn!
Since Halloween is just around the corner – I decided to shoot a gory and bloody Halloween epic scene. Last year we did “Dong of the Dead” – a story about a zombie who sought out to kill all girls in slutty Halloween costumes.
This year, I kind of did a parody of the Craft, but not really.
See when other companies do parodies, they REALLY do parodies. They build sets to match movies, the have everyone mimic the clothing and copy lines from the original word for word. I do very loose parodies. I kinda just parody the concept and then do my own thing from there. I’m still not sure what to call this one. I don’t like calling things “This is not ______” or “______ a XXX parody” and just use the original name. I like taking the name of the original movie and making it sexual. You know, like Re-Penetrator, or LA Pink etc.
So what do I call the Craft? “The Crotch“? Or “The Shaft” are the two names I was toying with. Do you like either of them? Why don’t you vote on it =).
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If I choose your suggestion, you get choose from:
– 1. A Free Month on The BurningAngel Network or
– 2. a DVD Signed by Me!
You can only vote once every hour & the first person with the suggestion that I pick wins.
In any case in my version of The Craft- me, Moretta and the new BurningAngel girl Felix were all hot goth-ish witch chicks who could never get laid… so we evoked the spirit of Tommy Pistol. We agreed to all share him, but then Felix changed her mind after he was um… evoked. She then put a curse on us so when me and Moretta went on dates with Tommy we both wound up killing ourselves in gruesome ways. I don’t want to spoil the ending but Felix comes up with a plan to spend the rest of her life with the spirit of Pistol… dead or alive. Dun dun dun! My creation took about 16 hours to film and we shot it in a loft with no air conditioning .. .and it was 106 degrees outside. I was incredibly angry that to really parody The Craft properly, I had to wear a cardigan… or else it just wouldn’t have been right.
Man. It was not a good day to wear a cardigan!
I was so consumed with working on the Big Bear movie- that I really left the planning of my Halloween movie till the last minute. I mean REALLY the last minute- like I got up at like 4 am the day of the shoot, watched The Craft for some inspiration, wrote the script around 6:30 AM then left for set around 8am. It was pretty ridiculous. Had I not been my own boss, I totally would have been fired for being so irresponsible. I might suspend my own pay for a week just to teach myself a lesson. But anyways… I will say- watching the Craft was really awesome. I haven’t watched that movie since I was in high school and man, it really was good. Everyone should take this time and re watch it before “The Crotch” or “The Shaft” comes out on BurningAngel on October 20th.
And that’s all I have to say for now!
Joanna Angel’s LA Pink
I still need to blog about my big adult film that will be coming out in September- LA PINK Starring Joanna Angel =) but I don’t really feel like doing that just yet. Maybe as the next blog entry I will do that. No it’s not that I just don’t feel like it- there are some things I need to gather together that I haven’t gotten together yet- that’s it. HOWEVER- there is a whole set of “behind the scenes” photos from the movie on JoannaAngel.com right now. Here is one of them.
LA Pink Photos
Well I was going to give this its own entry but – here is a little ad for the movie- cut and paste it and put it everywhere!
Here is the URL so you can put it on your MySpace
Oh, and I Love Cous Cous
So then I was thinking – what the hell should I blog about? What I really wanted to blog about was how much I love couscous. I eat it almost every night
for dinner with some vegetable mixed in it. I always make a whole pot and then tell myself I will save more for the next day- BUT I NEVER DO!! I ALWAYS EAT THE WHOLE GOD DAMN THING!
I will be honest- I would rather eat couscous than ice cream or chocolate. Is that lame? Sometimes I mix the couscous with asparagus- sometimes I mix it with broccoli (that’s what I did tonight) – and sometimes- now this is my favorite- I mix it with mushrooms. The mushrooms and the couscous really go quite well together.
But then I thought about how this might be kind of boring. I was like, I can’t blog about couscous! That is incredibly lame. Yet- here I am blogging about couscous anyways. I thought about blogging about how sad it is the Michael Jackson died, but I am sure that has been blogged about enough. I don’t know what to say other than it sucks that he died- and it sucks even more that he has really been dying for the past 15 years. It’s a sad story really. I hope he is happier where ever he is.
OK – I Love Twitter
I posted on My Twitter “what should I blog about” and I got a series of requests that seemed pretty uninteresting but I figured that anything is more interesting than couscous and Michael Jackson right now. So here it is:
@JoannaAngel Any new ladies to the scene we should hear from soon? from @sdpunk52
Follow Phoenix Askani on Twitter @PhoenixAskani
Lesbian Sex Virgin Phoenix Askani had her girl-girl cherry popped by me, Joanna Angel!
Join my site to be the FIRST to see.
Well actually- yes! There is a brand new porn girl who will be on BurningAngel very soon named Phoenix Askani (I hope I spelled that correctly). She was actually a BurningAngel.com member for a while which is pretty awesome. She recently came out here and shot some porn movies- some with guys and one with meeeeee! She had never been with a girl before me. I don’t mean to brag but I totally rocked her world. Do people still say that? I don’t really know. She shook and moaned a lot and it was pretty cool. I always like fucking girls who have never had lesbian sex- I think it’s a lot of fun. I can totally see why so many gay dudes I know like to bang straight dudes. I don’t know when the scene with me and her will go up on the web but the scene she did with Kris Slater will be up on BurningAngel soon.
@JoannaAngel how to fuck for world peace, right in your bedroom from @ianultra
I Love to Fuck in my Bedroom
I fuck a lot in my bedroom, my dining room, my closet, my bathroom and my kitchen- and I don’t have any idea how to make any of that lead to world peace. I just know how to film it and put it on the internet for people to get boners to. SORRY =(
@JoannaAngel what got you into punk? from @stin
Oh JEEZE. Well I don’t really remember why or how but I think in the 6th grade I started listening to bands like Sonic Youth, Nirvana, and Nine Inch Nails uh… Marilyn Manson… you know… stuff like that. I searched for any kind of music that was angry or weird sounding. I mean, I guess I was “punk” then I just wasn’t sure what it was, what it meant and where uh “punk” people went and congregated. Then when I was in the 10th some dude who was a friend of a friend that I had a slight crush on brought me to a punk-rock show at someone’s house in Northern New Jersey. The Casualties were playing- along with some other small local New Jersey bands. It was nuts- people with mohawks everywhere were jumping up and down and yelling and screaming in leather jackets with spikes on them and stuff. I wound up having a bigger crush on punk rock in general than the dude I went to the show with. That year I got all my first punk records and blah blah blah. I guess it is history from there.
@JoannaAngel alternatively: creampie eating and why it’s not gay? Discuss. from @notwoodyallen
Um. The only guy I ever knew who was into cream-pie eating was Kurt Lockwood- who is a full time gay porn star now. There might be other guys out there who eat their own jizz out of girls’ pussies who are not gay- but I have not met one yet.
@JoannaAngel talk about the state of the economy? @thebelltolls
It fucking sucks and I hope it gets better. And neither porn, escorting or stripping are recession proof…. although- I think reality TV is. If you are hell-bent on pitching around an idea for a reality TV show that by the off chance hasn’t been done yet then there is hope for you.
@JoannaAngel chinese food and/or the electoral college from @gimmegrits
I’ll be honest- I don’t really like Chinese food THAT much. It always smells good but then once you start eating it you are like- blaaaah. The only Chinese food I really like are steamed dumplings. I am not just saying that because I am a bit of a health nut- but the steamed dumplings genuinely taste much better than the fried ones. I once got a bunch of frozen dumplings from Trader Joes and attempted to steam them at home and they didn’t taste anywhere close to as good as what they taste like in the Chinese restaurants. I would have to say that in the future I will not be purchasing any more frozen dumplings. When I want some, I will just go to any Chinese food place and get them- but why would I even do that when I could just stay home and eat couscous? After Bush won the election for the second time- I had very strong feelings of hatred towards the electoral college. I went on long diatribes about how unfair it was, and how inefficient it was and blah blah blah- but you know, after the last election I don’t think it’s so bad anymore. Sometimes the electoral college can surprise you and do some cool things sometimes. I mean, I honestly can’t think of a better way to tally up all those votes so until I do I will just keep my mouth shut.
Well – that’s it! If you liked this I will turn it into a weekly thing and answer peoples questions on twitter like, on the regular. Maybe it is a nice healthy way to intertwine my blog life and my twitter life- or something.